Men should fight for their own rights, of course!

It is interesting that in a panel discussion on women and violence/ safety, the panellists are venting frustration about men’s rights activists (MRAs).  See the news and my comments below:

http://www.thehindu.com/news/cities/Hyderabad/article304563.ece

HYDERABAD, March 25, 2010

For every woman who is fighting for a law to protect her rights, there are a handful of men who say: what about us?

“Why don't they struggle for their rights,” asks Flavia Agnes. The fiery women's rights lawyer was here on Wednesday for a panel discussion on “Women and Violence/ Safety.”

“Men need to stop taking away the gains of the women's movement,” she said. “Women are fighting for their rights because men and women are not equal. If you make laws assuming they are equal, the law will hardly serve its purpose.”

Comments: So the feminists seem to be frustrated by the activities of a handful of MRAs!  Organisations like Save Indian Family Foundation and AIMWA (All India Men’s Welfare Association) have taken the fight for men’s rights into the feminists camp, and they are not very happy that they have to now play football with a real opposition team in front, while all this while they could score goals since there was no opposition team to begin with.

And that point about men and women being equal or not equal.  These feminists have guts to say in the same sentence that men and women are equal, and that men and women are not equal.  Heads I win, tails you lose!

India's legal system dominated the discussion - panellists agreed that despite their rigid formality, the courts were the only place where victims of rape, dowry harassment or any other assault could demand justice.

Points to ponder

But for them to get justice, other things would have to change. Stop expecting women to be this or that, said historian Urvashi Butalia. “People seem shocked that women harass women. But we can be as nasty, rude and aggressive as a man. Why should we be expected to behave any differently?”

Comments: Shocked that women can be as nasty, rude, and aggressive as men? Not me!  And not the men’s rights activists who believe strongly that the bias in laws in favour of women is just plain nonsense in garb of women empowerment, constitutional provisions for women, and so on.

The law will respond to violence against women when society responds to it rather than merely trying to cure it. “We spend too much time thinking about how to make men better husbands,” Ms. Agnes said. “But the question is why are women committing suicide when they have the option of obtaining a divorce?”

Comments: How people are out of touch with reality.  The men’s rate of suicide is double that of women, and in fact increasing continuously since 2002 while the suicide rate of women is stable.  Of course, this comment comes from a feminist who believes women ought to be happier living their lives away from men  -- an assertion most women themselves will not agree with!

When the law offers them a way of exiting their marriage, why do women continue to struggle or suffer? “Is suicide the only choice she can afford to make? We need to ask ourselves that.”

NALSAR professor Dr. Amita Dhanda also spoke.

UN super agency to help women or help radical feminists?

A recent news has made a United Nations’ super-agency out of 4 existing agencies working for benefit of women.  Read full news later:

It is however not clear if this move will really help in empowerment of women.  Most likely the consolidated funds will be used to strengthen the position of the few top feminists in these organisations.

http://www.c-fam.org/publications/id.1660/pub_detail.asp

By Samantha Singson Amanda Pawloski

     NEW YORK, July 8 (C-FAM)  Last Friday the General Assembly voted to consolidate four separate United Nations (UN) bodies dedicated to women’s issues into one new gender equality entity called “UN Women.” The resolution capped a victory for radical feminists who lobbied for years for the new entity and is the latest in an overall push to bring women’s issues even more onto the UN agenda.
     After four years of sometimes harsh negotiations, member states agreed on simplifying the disjointed efforts of four UN offices dedicated to women’s issues; the United Nations Development Fund for Women (UNIFEM), the International Research and Training Institute for the Advancement of Women (INSTRAW), Division for the Advancement of Women (DAW) and the Office of the Special Advisor on Gender Issues and Advancement of Women (OSAGI).
     The framework for UN Women is the Beijing Platform for Action, which calls for an end to discrimination against women especially highlighting education, employment, political participation and human rights. An Under-Secretary-General appointed by UN Secretary-General Ban Ki-moon will head the new body and member states are calling for a prompt appointment before the General Assembly meets in September. Many are speculating that former Chilean President Michelle Bachelet will be chosen. Bachelet is a socialist who promoted reproductive health and women’s rights during her political career. The Under-Secretary-General will hold a 4-year term with a possibility of one renewable term.
     The Gender Equality Architecture Reform (GEAR) campaign, a coalition of radical feminist groups and abortion advocates, has relentlessly lobbied to create a UN super-agency to deal with women’s issues. Charlotte Bunch, executive director of the Centre for Women's Global Leadership and the leading advocate of the GEAR campaign, said, “We have high expectations for this new agency [...] The coalition of women’s groups and other social justice, human rights and development organizations that played a pivotal role in this effort will now turn its efforts toward ensuring that the new body has the human and financial resources necessary to succeed.”
     The new body will be governed by an executive board consisting of 41 members: 10 African, 10 Asian, 4 Eastern European, 5 Western European/Other States, 6 Latin American/Caribbean, and 6 from contributing countries, of which 4 seats are allocated to the largest donor countries and 2 seats to donors from developing countries.
     Some member states have expressed concern that the cultures and objectives of recipient countries would not be respected. The resolution reaffirms that there is no “one size fits all” approach to development assistance, reflecting what is generally a split between rich industrial states where radical feminism holds sway and poorer countries where basic necessities must be met.
     Wendy Wright, President of Concerned Women of America, told the Friday Fax, "Women need respect and opportunity, not a global agency demanding money and power for its well-heeled elitist leaders. The money would be better spent going directly to the areas and people in need with programs that have proven to work, not to another agency to empower the people who run it."

The money meant to be spent on women empowerment and on poor women usually goes to fund lifestyles of radical feminists associated with few ‘top’ women organisations.  A proof of that can be seen in glaring mismanagement of funds shown in Comptroller and Auditor General of India’s (CAG) audit report on NCW (National Commission for Women) here:

http://commandos.in/wiki/rti/real/central/dept/cag/cagreportonncw/reply

Domestic violence survey on men is welcome step

Recently a high court judge had said in a seminar that if he went strictly by definition of Indian domestic violence act against women(PWDVA), he will be guilty of domestic violence on his wife.  Actually, if the domestic violence act was made gender neutral, his wife will also be guilty of domestic violence on him.  This is because the definition of domestic violence is defined to be very broad, and further a woman has simply to allege to get the wheels of justice (read: torture for men) in motion.

http://epaper.timesofindia.com/Default/Scripting/ArticleWin.asp?From=Archive&Source=Page&Skin=TOINEW&BaseHref=TOICH/2010/04/19&PageLabel=19&EntityId=Ar01901&ViewMode=HTML&GZ=T

 

Seeking to counter certain “exaggerated” claims made by some women’s organisations and in a bid to draw the attention of the government to the plight of men victimised by lop-sided laws drafted on the basis of such claims, men’s organisations in the city have now embarked upon the task of conducting a massive domestic violence survey.

    The results of the nationwide survey, widely believed to be the first of its kind for men in the country, will be used to find out if whether Indian men too are victims of domestic violence, the percentage of Indian men subjected to such violence and the kind of violence they are subjected to.

    The need for the survey has been triggered, it seems, by the controversial Domestic Violence Act - 2005, which seems to have been drafted on the assumption that only women suffer domestic violence.

    Says Suresh Ram, member of the All India Men’s Welfare Association (AIMWA), an NGO working for the rights of men and boys, “Certain women’s organisations have been stereotyping the issue of domestic violence. They have presented a picture that conveys the impression that only women are victims of domestic violence while we have with us global surveys and over 250 scholarly studies that show that women are at least as likely as men to engage in partner aggression and that partner violence is often mutual. This fact is established if one goes through the Domestic Violence Study conducted by a well known global organisation that
has done the survey in over 32 countries including India. However, the Domestic Violence Act in India offers protection to only women and not men.” He further adds, “So, to set things right, we men’s organisations have joined hands to ensure that a credible and transparent survey on the issue is done. Eight men’s organisations are involved in this effort which is being led by the AIMWA. We have begun negotiations with survey agencies to conduct the survey in certain cities of the country including Chennai, Delhi, Kolkata, Bangalore and Hyderabad. We intend to publish the results on Nov 19, the International Men’s Day.” So, what do they intend to achieve by conducting such a survey? Says Suresh, “We intend to create an awareness in society about the problems faced by men. We wish to present to them the real situation in society. We will also seek to draw the government’s attention to issues concerning men and reiterate our demand for setting up a National Commission for Men and a Men’s Welfare Ministry.” Men in the city are delighted with the move by the men’s organisations. Welcoming such a survey, Shankar, a graphics designer, says, “I certainly welcome the move. It is high time that facts were presented on this issue.” Women too seem to be for such a survey. Says Dakshayini Sampath, a media professional, “While I think that more number of women suffer domestic violence, it’s also possible that men are victims. I think the law should hold good for both genders and if this survey is going to help bring about a uniform law, then I’m all for it.”

Will feminists ask for equal opportunities in such deadly jobs?

Refer to news below about death of miners in Russia in dangerous mines.

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/europe/article7121731.ece#cid=OTC-RSS&attr=797093

Rescuers were searching desperately for 58 people still missing in a Russian coal mine yesterday as the death toll from twin methane blasts rose to 32.

Hopes were fading of finding survivors more than 450 metres underground at the Raspadskaya pit in Siberia, Russia’s largest underground mine. Eighteen of the victims have been rescuers who died in the second explosion on Sunday after going in search of miners trapped by the first blast late on Saturday.

Twelve miners died and 71 were hurt in that explosion as 370 people worked underground at the mine in the Kemerovo region. Sergei Shoigu, the Emergency Situations Minister, said that the body of the 31st victim, a rescue worker, had been recovered as a large-scale search mission resumed.

The feminists take great pains to point out statistics about why there is still less percentage of women CEOs in corporations, why women are being denied powerful jobs, there is a glass ceiling blah blah… They never seem to highlight the fact that even today, most of the deadly, dangerous, life-threatening, debilitating jobs are done by men and which do not pay any great amounts either!

Men who become CEOs also have to go through years of grind, being away from family on travel, miss out on life beyond work, to be able to have a chance at reaching that position.  It is not served to them on a platter simply because of their gender.  But for feminists, the logic of female supremacy reigns supreme, that just by her gender, a woman should be entitled to equal outcomes, irrespective of whether she is willing to put up same amount of work or travel to reach a top job.

Will the real opposition to dowry stand up please?

This is the response received to an RTI application filed on Women and Child Development Ministry.  According to this RTI response, WCD ministry has not spent a single Rupee on any advertisement campaign against dowry, or extravagant marriages in Apr 2009-Mar 2010.

RTI response is also given in PDF format below:

http://dl.dropbox.com/u/2371641/RTIs_SIFF/WCD-RTI-anti-dowry-exp-marriage.pdf

This is the same WCD ministry which had bungled and carried out an advertisement issued on the occasion of the National Girl Child Day that carried a photograph of the former Pakistan Air Force chief, Tanvir Ahmed Mahmood.

So it seems they WCD does not spend any money on reducing dowry and extravagant marriages… and when they do spend money on a women’s issue, it is bungled so badly that Prime minister’s office (PMO) has to issue an apology on behalf of WCD.

Man gets divorce confirmation from Mumbai HC after 18 years

So if you are a man and want divorce, pray that your wife breaks into your house after alleging you are having extra-marital affair, and hopefully in your lifetime you will be granted divorce by supreme court, err high court in this case.  Surely things are improving for men since Supreme Court’s Justice Katju’s comment to a husband who had applied for divorce: “you have waited for 17 years, you can wait for few more months”.

http://www.dnaindia.com/india/report_false-allegations-of-infidelity-can-be-ground-for-divorce_1373294

Mina’s act of breaking into Amit’s house and alleging that he was having an extramarital affair were enough to prove the charge of cruelty, the court said. “The appellant [Mina] must have obviously caused tremendous hardship, inconvenience, unnecessary expenses, and mental anguish to the respondent,” the judges said in their order. “Such conduct would definitely constitute cruelty.”

Mina said she wanted to live with Amit, but the court observed that the couple had been living separately for 18 years, of which 10 were under the same roof.

Upholding the family court’s order granting divorce, the judges said, “The conduct of preventing the respondent from entering the matrimonial home is not the conduct of a wife who wants the marriage to be continued. Similar is the conduct of making unprovoked false allegations of an extramarital affair.”

Indian men facing domestic violence in New Zealand from wives

I found this story interesting in the sense that it is like an analogy to those stories of women being married to men in another country and then being made to work like slaves, and not given due respect.  Well, don’t blame everything on men.  See for yourselves what kind of abuse unscrupulous women are capable of:

Male victims speak out on marriage abuse

29/03/2010 13:16:00 Venkat Raman

Contrary to popular belief, women are not the only victims of family violence, failed or fraudulent marriages. An increasing number of men are beginning to speak out with horrifying tales of misuse and abuse, including false complaints to the Police.

Following our front-page story, India moves to end fraudulent marriages published in our March 1, 2010 issue, a number of male readers of Indian Newslink have contacted us to narrate their predicament, seeking justice from the Governments of New Zealand and India, stating that they are at their wits end.

While we have reason to believe the veracity of their statements, we have protected their identity for obvious reasons.

Wellington based Paramjit (not his real name) told us of the `extreme verbal and physical abuse' that he suffered soon after migrating to New Zealand from his native India where he married a Fiji-born woman resident in this country.

"I worked hard to keep my wife and my parents-in-law (joint family) happy. I soon adopted myself to the domestic and professional environment. Although I earn high income compared to many other people of Indian origin, I was subject to ridicule and humiliation both at home and in public by my wife. She often told me that I was useless and that it was due to her grace and mercy that I live in New Zealand," he said.

Paramjit said his life took a turn for the worse, when his parents from India came to live in New Zealand following the birth of his daughter.

"My wife started misbehaving with them as well. She made them do all the homework, look after our child – she started treating them like slaves. Whenever I questioned her behaviour, she would threaten that she would complain to the Police and have me arrested for domestic violence," he said.

Paramjit said the abuse became so unbearable that he once contemplated suicide.

He recently left his wife to live with his parents.

There are at least three such cases in Wellington, currently under our investigation.

East Auckland resident Ramesh (not his real name) had a similar experience.

The young man, from Karnataka in South India, married a young woman, born and raised in New Zealand, hoping for a happier life.

He has a successful career as an engineer, but at home, he is a nervous wreck.

"This person, who calls herself a woman, has no love or care for me and our only male child, who is now three years old. I have been married for five years now, but life is hell. I do all the housework, including cooking, washing and cleaning, after a long day at work. Sometimes I do shift duty but that does not mean a thing at home. I still have to do all the work," he said.

He said his wife liked to have parties at home with friends and their families at least once a month, at each of which he becomes an object of ridicule.

"She takes great pleasure in announcing to her friends that I am a good-for-nothing man and that she had made the greatest mistake in marrying me. I have often talked to her about divorce but she simply does not care. I continue to suffer," he said.

Ramesh has not contemplated leaving the house and living separately, for fear of upsetting his aged parents in India.

But the case of Satish (not his real name) in Central Auckland was among the worst that we have heard during our interviews.

Born and raised in a poor family in India, Satish was married to a rich woman of Indian origin in New Zealand less than a year ago.

"I came to this country on a visitor visa to live with my wife, her parents and three brothers. Three days after my arrival, I was asked to do all the housework. I obtained a work permit with the help of a friendly neighbour. They would still not help me in cooking and washing. My wife and I have a joint bank account and I do not get a cent for personal expenses. Life is hell," he said.